How Many Bridesmaids Should I Actually Have? Let Me Break It Down
The Real Numbers (Not Some Made-Up Fantasy)
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According to The Knot’s 2023 Real Weddings Study, most brides end up with four bridesmaids. That’s it. Four. Not the twelve-person army you’ve seen on Pinterest, not the single ride-or-die from those minimalist wedding blogs. Just four normal people standing beside them.
The typical range falls between 4-5 attendants on each side, which should immediately make you breathe easier if you’ve been spiraling about whether six is “too many” or two is “too few.”
What Actually Matters When Picking Your Number
Your Wedding Size Isn’t Just Background Noise
I learned this the hard way at my cousin’s wedding. She had seven bridesmaids at a 60-person backyard ceremony, and honestly? It looked like the bridesmaids were hosting a separate event.
Here’s what actually makes sense:
- Tiny weddings (under 50 guests): Stick with 1-3 bridesmaids unless you want your wedding party to outnumber your actual guests
- Medium-sized celebrations (50-200 guests): 3-5 bridesmaids hits that sweet spot
- Big productions (200+ guests): Go ahead with 6-8 if that’s genuinely who you want up there
Your Venue Space Will Humble You Real Quick
I’ve seen brides plan for eight bridesmaids only to realize their charming historic chapel can barely fit four without someone getting shoved into a flower arrangement.
Walk your ceremony space. Physically imagine bodies standing there. If your venue has a narrow aisle or limited altar space, having more than 4-5 attendants turns into an awkward game of human Tetris. Consider grabbing a venue layout planner to visualize the space properly.
The Budget Reality Check Nobody Wants to Hear
Each bridesmaid costs you money. I’m not saying this to be harsh—I’m saying it because I’ve watched friends go into debt trying to be generous.
Per bridesmaid, you’re typically covering:
- Bridesmaid gift ($50-150)
- Hair and makeup if you’re requiring a specific look ($100-200)
- Transportation on the wedding day ($20-50)
- Bachelorette weekend contributions (varies wildly)
- Thank you gestures for pre-wedding help ($30-100)
That’s potentially $200-500 per person before they spend a dime on their dress. Multiply that by eight bridesmaids and you’re looking at $4,000. Just for having people stand next to you. Get yourself a wedding budget planner and run the actual numbers before you start handing out proposals.
The Coordination Nightmare Factor
More bridesmaids means more schedules to juggle. More opinions about dress colors. More dietary restrictions for the bridal brunch. More people who need their feelings managed when they can’t make the bachelorette party. I watched my sister try to coordinate nine bridesmaids and she aged approximately five years during dress shopping alone.
Smaller wedding parties offer:
- Easier scheduling for pre-wedding events
- Faster decision-making
- More intimate getting-ready moments
- Less drama (usually)
- Actual conversations instead of managing a small conference
The Questions You’re Actually Googling at 2 AM
“Can I Have More Bridesmaids Than My Partner Has Groomsmen?”
Yes. Absolutely yes. This isn’t Noah’s Ark—nobody needs to pair up. I’ve photographed weddings with seven bridesmaids and three groomsmen, and the photos looked perfectly fine. Anyone clutching their pearls about “uneven sides” is stuck in 1952.
“Is Four Bridesmaids Too Many for a 40-Person Wedding?”
Here’s my honest take: it’s on the higher end proportionally, but if these are genuinely your four closest people, include them. I’d rather see four authentic relationships than two obligatory ones. That said, at a 40-person wedding, your bridesmaids represent 10% of your guest list. Just be aware they’ll have a significant visual presence.
“What If I Want Zero Bridesmaids?”
Then have zero bridesmaids! The “no wedding party” trend is growing specifically because people are exhausted by obligatory traditions. Your friends will still show up. They’ll still celebrate you. They just won’t wear matching bridesmaid robes for getting-ready photos.
“Can I Have Ten Bridesmaids If I Really Want To?”
Technically? Sure. Practically? Think hard about this. I’ve been to weddings with 8-10 bridesmaids and it often feels less like a wedding party and more like a sorority recruitment event.
Red flags that you might have too many:
- You’re including people out of obligation, not genuine closeness
- You can’t imagine having a real conversation with all of them on your wedding morning
- You’re worried about hurting feelings more than celebrating relationships
- The logistics are already giving you stress hives
My Actual Advice After Watching Hundreds of Weddings
Start with who you’d want in the room when you’re getting dressed. Not who “should” be there according to family expectations. Not who was nice enough to include you in their wedding. Who do you actually want seeing you in your
